


Emotional Sabotage

by LadyBarbaric



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Angst, Eventual Smut, F/M, Romance, Slow-ish burn, awkward space flirting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-28
Updated: 2016-02-28
Packaged: 2018-05-23 16:18:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6122227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyBarbaric/pseuds/LadyBarbaric
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Reader is a Resistance spy hidden in the First Order. Assigned as a navigator aboard the <i>Finalizer</i>, she finds herself receiving unlikely attention from her commanding officer, whom she finds frustratingly alluring. Eventually, she must choose between her cause and her stupid heart. </p><p>Reader/Hux.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader is a Resistance spy hidden in the First Order. Assigned as a navigator aboard the _Finalizer_ , she finds herself receiving unlikely attention from her commanding officer, whom she finds frustratingly alluring. Eventually, she must choose between her cause and her stupid heart. 
> 
> Reader/Hux.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trash for the Space Nazi. 
> 
> Most names are pulled out of my ass, don't even ask.

_"Once you go undercover, we will not be able to communicate again. The decision to make any move in behalf of the resistance is yours, and we will not be prepared to get you out. If you are discovered, you will most likely die."_

Quite the pep talk, you had thought at the time. It smacked of excitement, of how dangerous and nervewracking such an undertaking would be. It said nothing of how perfectly dull it would be up to that point. As things were, you were bored out of your mind. On this day, you camped out in the simulator with a fellow navigator, working through sequences of problems and how to solve them; plotting courses, calculating hyperspace travel, accounting for certain patterns of asteroids and such, in various levels of critical scenarios. Your head rested in your palm as you plotted the course with one hand. Dull and anti-climactic. 

"I heard from a mechanic that they're preparing us to be sent off," Ellerly, your fellow navigator and one of few friends, finally broke the silence. You hummed, an inquisitive noise that asked for him to continue. He glanced over at you. "I also heard an interesting rumor. I believe we're traveling with a high-ranking command officer. They're preparing special staterooms. Two." 

"Quite the gossip, aren't you?" you teased. He turned red. 

"No one talks to me in the mess hall, what else am I going to do but listen?" he rebuked, tapping a key perhaps too hard; several of the same number was entered into the computer, and you had to fix it before you failed the simulation. Ellerly murmured a sorry, and you shrug. "Nothing's been confirmed officially yet, but the signs are there, anyway." 

"Who do you suppose?" you inquired. 

"I heard something about one of the Supreme Leader's Knights," he answered. The simulation wrapped up and you got your score; room to improve, of course, but the pair of you were of the best navigators on your ship. You climbed to your feet and stretched out your limbs, giving Ellerly a look. "I don't know if I believe it-- it came from that girl in maintenence, I don't believe a word she says-- but wouldn't it be exciting? We would have something directly to do with this conflict, not just keeping territories in line." 

"It would be interesting, at least," you conceded. 

Ellerly led you out of the simulator and towards a lift. "Things should get better from here. At least we won't be sitting around anymore." 

"I suppose." 

A week later, and the announcement came about formally. Your captain addressed you all via the comms systems. 

"We are to be directly under the command of General Hux himself. It is a great honor. Our gracious General will be introducing himself to each of our crew personally in the week before we are set to begin our mission." You heard a few people cheer, and a smattering of applause. That pause though... You and Ellerly exchanged looks. "We will also be joined Kylo Ren, of the Supreme Leader's Knights of Ren. I expect nothing but excellence from all of you." 

There were a few uncertain murmurs when the comms cut out, but mostly excitement. You and Ellerly swapped looks. Whatever will it be like working in such proximity to one of the highest ranking officers in the First Order? You didn't have to wait long to find out. Day two into his interviews with the staff of the _Finalizer_ , the navigators were called to a special room. 

"Where are you from?" The question threw you off beat a tick, probably as it would have any of the new officers. Why should he be so friendly? But he offered a smile, however shallow, and you offered one in return. 

"Anuine, sir. Place was a total disaster, I was relieved when the First Order came to help," you answered. "I grew up in the metal district, and honestly, sir, it was awful." 

"We picked up a few spies from there, you know." He said, as if this was a normal conversation and not a game with your life as the prize. 

"I'd heard rumors!" you exclaimed, as if surprised. Would he buy it? "You know, I'm honestly not surprised. There was a scrapper on my street that seemed a bit... off? Lot of people in and out with little to do with metal."

"Is that so? What's this scrapper's name?" 

"Lask." 

The scrapper, you knew, was a contact to the Resistance. You also knew they died the day before you signed on with the First Order. They had little in their home to actually lead to the the Resistance, but enough that it would support your "suspicion." He looked to an officer at his side, indicating an investigation, and looked back at you, seemingly pleased. 

He watched your expression work into a sly smile. "You already knew where I was from, didn't you, sir?" you asked. A pleasant surprise. His lips twitched upward in the corners. And you caught yourself thinking he was somewhat attractive... for a fascist. 

"Yes, I did." Tension poured from your fellow navigators at the way you called him out in such a way. At his easy admittance. "You're clever. Refreshing.""

"Thank you, sir." You looked to your side, to where Ellerly usually was, in an attempt to change the subject of the conversation. Ellerly, like a few others, looked uncomfortable. A couple looked jealous.

"General Hux, sir, might I ask a change of topic?" 

You shuffled quietly to the back of the group now, as a few ambitious officers fought for the General's attention. You considered your options. You could distance yourself from the general and keep anonymous, easier to quietly spy, or you could try to build on this initial pleasance, and perhaps become privy to top information. After the tiniest bit of consideration, you decided to let it go wherever it went. 

You and Ellerly spent the rest of the general's visit in a corner of the room, rolling your eyes at the career officers trying to get in good with him. "He had quite an interest in you though, didn't he?" Ellerly commented quietly. You shrugged. 

"I think it's just that I wasn't raised on a planet already a part of the First Order. I can understand the suspicion," you figured. Ellerly took a thoughtful pause, and then nodded. He smiled. 

"I guess, but I'm sure he knows you're nothing to worry about now. I trust you, anyway." 

You smiled. "Thanks, Ellerly."

General Hux caught you on your way out of the charming little meet-and-greet, to your surprise. Ellerly was, in a manner, forced to move on without you, lest he create a bad impression on the general already. "General?" you both greet and inquire. 

He seemed almost awkward for a moment, then offered a subtle smile. "It was good to meet you. I'm looking forward to seeing how your tip plays out for us." While you recognized a subtle threat when you heard it, this seemed more like an excuse. It was sort of charming.

You smiled at him and offered your hand to shake. "I'm looking forward to working for you, General." 

You berated yourself later when you caught yourself thinking about wicked blue eyes and sharp features, well-groomed red hair and flawless airs. Don't get suckered into this garbage, you thought, they're the bad guys. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've discovered that there is a direct correlation between my writing and the amount of pot in the house. Just in case anyone wanted to know.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader deals with trauma from First Order indoctrinations, and finds herself recieving unexpected attention her first day at her post.

_"The Jedi are extinct," the words rang out in your head. It was General Hux's voice, you knew it now. His voice that enforced the ideas that the Jedi were never in the interests of the people; that they bred chaos, and the galaxy was better off without them._

_"The New Republic has failed you," the words boomed in your ears. General Hux. He planted thoughts in the weak-minded that the New Republic stood idly by as terrorism tore apart worlds and let the people die; that they did not care, and instead chose to bicker over petty problems._

_"The Resistance will destroy the galaxy if we do not crush them first," the words taunted you, begging you to argue. You did not. The image of General Hux. You trembled at the sight of him, feeling two inches tall._

_"The First Order is the only hope for the galaxy," the words said softly, in a similar tone to the way he spoke to you at your first meeting. His hand, cold, long-fingered, lovely, cupped your chin, persuading you to look him in the eyes, and your heart pounded with the unexpected closeness. The First Order is the only hope for the galaxy, he told you, and for a moment, you believed it._

You woke up in a sweat, in a panic at the thought of believing such propaganda. You sat up in bed, drawing your knees up and letting the sheets fall about your waist. The heels of your palms rubbed firmly against your eyelids, trying to get the images, the words out of your head. By the time you were drying yourself after a shower, you'd forgotten most of the dream... except the bit where the General was speaking to you in such an endearing tone. You couldn't possibly feel attracted to him after one meeting. Maybe it was hormones. The change in atmosphere. The relief at finally being deployed. It was something else, you insisted. 

\------ 

You were not on shift when the _Finalizer_ set out, and part of you hoped that the General would be far from the bridge when you and another relieved the navigators. At first, you were so lucky, and the first half of your shift passed uneventfully. You were not so lucky for the second half. 

"....there's a solar storm in that sector, we need to compensate," you alerted the other navigator as you brought up a chart to plot a new course at your terminal. She gave you an affirmation, glancing up at you and then doing a double-take. A presence over your shoulder, you realized. You glanced over your shoulder, and started. "S-sir."

"Carry on, ensign," General Hux said, even as you returned to your data plotting. You worked out a slight change in course, one that would only put you off your target arrival time by an hour or so, and glanced back at the general again. "An estimation of our arrival, ensign?"

"2000 hours tomorrow, approximately," you answered. He made a pleased noise. 

"Excellent." You turned your attention from your terminal to your superior, as to not be disrespectful. General Hux's lips twitched towards a smile at your attentions. He shifted his arms behind his back. "I thought you would like to know the results of our investigation into your former neighbor."

You gestured. "If you're so inclined, sir, I would admit to a mild curiosity." There was a smile. He looked at the ground a moment, then back up. 

"It seems you have good instincts," he started. You wanted to roll your eyes, but fought the urge. "Lask was communicating with the rebels. We found some codes hidden among their belongings." 

"So they're in your custody? Do you think they'll reveal anything more?" you inquired innocently, peering upwards. At that, his expression turned sour.

"Unfortunately, they were deceased before we found them. We believe they were killed in a riot when we liberated the planet," General Hux lamented. You frowned, biting your cheek. He shook his head. "All the same, we did find important scramble codes they're using to communicate. I wanted to thank you personally."

You smiled. The codes were outdated, you knew. You checked your terminal before readdressing the General. "I'm glad to help, sir, even if it was by chance." It looked as though his face was turning slightly red, and you found it endearing. He was so pale, the red looked wonderful on his angular cheeks. 

"Yes, well..." he trailed off, looking at the floor. You watched him, somewhat confused, before you caught on. He wanted to talk to you. That was why he brought up the spy, even though he had no obligation to share that information. It seemed as though he didn't entirely think this through. You couldn't help the giggle, and his attention snapped back up to you, eyes demanding to know what was so funny. You stifled another. 

"Did you... was this just an excuse to start a conversation with me, sir?" you asked. He opened his mouth a couple times, before straightening himself. 

"Should I need an excuse?" he said, reaffirming his authority. You straightened yourself in your seat, looking down for shame. Maybe you misread him. 

"Of, of course not. Maybe it was just wishful thinking on my part." The words came out before you could consider them; you had needed some excuse to avoid being reprimanded, but you didn't want to say that. You weren't even sure if your reaction was honest or a farce. At your words, the sight of your mortification and bright red cheeks, the general actually smirked. 

"Do you enjoy having my attention, ensign?" he said, low and lilting, teasing. Your cheeks enflamed further, and words stumbled and stuttered past your lips. 

"I... ex-excuse me, sir, i-..... I should probably resume my work, I..." 

"Carry on, ensign. I'll not distract you further," he said. His voice held the full authority he usually spoke with, seemingly much more confident after watching you become so flustered. His eyes seemed to shine with promises of distracting you again sometime. 

You turned back to your work as he left, cursing. This wasn't okay. You shouldn't. You started to feel like every part of that conversation was intentional on his part... Like he was testing you. Was it about the spy you named? Or... God. No. He wasn't trying to give you _that_ kind of attention, he couldn't be.

\------

Serves them right, you thought, reading over a report of the destruction of a rebel base. You got through another paragraph before what you'd realized what you had been thinking. You were horrified. The indoctrination that was a daily part of life in the First Order was affecting you in awful ways; working its way into your head, coloring your dreams and thoughts with awful things. You were stronger than this. You were NOT loyal to the First Order. You didn't buy their propaganda. It was lies. 

You were so absorbed in your thoughts that you didn't notice General Hux was present until Ellerly was snapping his fingers in front of your face to get your attention. You looked around, startled. Ellerly looked concerned, but there was a spot of bemusement in the general's expression. You joined Ellerly in jumping to your feet. 

"Sir! Apologies, I..." you trailed off, not prepared with an excuse. Hux gave the two of you the at-ease, and Ellerly was shocked when he took a seat with the pair of you. 

"I didn't want to distract you, ensign. I thought I'd come find you on your off time, is this alright?" He asked. You smiled slightly, tired. Off shift, and he was still calling you 'ensign.' He had a special kind of complex, you figured. Didn't let anyone forget who he was. Blatant display of the fascism he represented.

"Of course, sir. Who would to dare say it wasn't?" you joked. He smirked; he was definitely pleased by any reference to his authority. Your head tilted into one palm, sending him a curious look. "What brings you looking for me anyhow, sir?"

He straightened his collar, and you'd have taken it as a sign of nerves, if you believed he had any; the look in his eyes, his posture, all of it read to be very intentional, that every move was calculated. Ellerly was looking between the two of you almost dumbfounded. "I have very little time at the moment, but I'd like to have a word with you later, perhaps after your shift tomorrow." You swallowed. Did something with the resistance member the other day implicate you? You were careful about your wording around him. You were trained to be convincing. You forced a smile; he noticed your discomfort, and frowned. 

"That is, if you wouldn't like..." He didn't finish, instead moving to the edge of his seat, as if to leave. Your eyebrows shot up. 

"Oh! You don't mean... You mean a casual word?" You asked. Hux nodded his affirmation. Your expression flooded with relief and you smiled again, looking down in embarrassment. "Oh, I'd thought.... I was afraid I'd done something wrong."

"Of course not. You're proficient in your job." Perhaps it was a compliment. You glanced up at him. He took delight in your surprise, your embarrassment. "I am still waiting for an answer."

"Oh! Yes, of course. I-I'd like that, sir." 

The General graced you with a smile and bid you farewell, back to whatever business he had to attend. You finally let the shock sink in, staring wordlessly at the chair he had previously occupied. It was silent a few moments, before Ellerly had to speak. 

"What in the world was _that_?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader goes to meet Hux after work, unclear on whether it's a talk, or a "talk," and the general makes his intentions known.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for kudos, and thank you TimeToGetSithFaced and neopolitan513 for commenting.

Orders from General Hux the next day had you plotting a course for a planet called Jakku; it was surprisingly close, and would take a short time to get there through hyperspace. Ellerly was your co-navigator today, and kept shooting you looks throughout your work. You were about to have enough. 

"Spit it out, Ellerly," you said. He couldn't for a moment, not sure how to say whatever it was, but you were certain it was about your plans for after your shift. 

"You... You know it's like, a _date_? Are you... are you sure it's a good idea?" he finally choked out. You shrugged, typing in more code. It wasn't a date. Couldn't have been. Just casual talking. It's only a date if you go it somewhere right? He was just... You gave him good information, maybe he wanted to see if you knew anymore. "Is it-- I mean, can we even have relationships with superior officers? And I mean, even if-- I mean, the _gener--_ " 

"Ellerly, not an appropriate time," you cut in. You didn't need anyone else overhearing. You knew one of the communications officers working near you now had been determined to get the general's attention on herself, and you didn't need that right now. Ellerly bit his tongue. He looked irritated, and you sighed. "I don't think it's anything like that, Ellerly. It's just... It's just talking until it turns to something else, and I don't think it will."

Ellerly conceded, but you could tell he didn't believe a word of it. You finished your coding, had Ellerly double check it, and spent the rest of your shift predicting weather patterns to kill time. Eventually, Ellerly started speaking to you again, talking again about rumors.

"Lord Ren is after a resistance member on Jakku I hear," he murmurs over the terminals. You glance up, curious. "No one knows why he's chasing this person in particular, but I hear it's important." 

"Key resistance members, I could see why it would be so important for the Supreme Leader to send someone to ensure they don't get away." You reasoned. Ellerly nodded. 

\------

It wasn't until your shift ended that you realized you had no idea where to meet him. You hung around in the rec room where he found you last time, but nothing came of it. You sat reading in the rec room again a few hours before giving up and returning to your quarters. You had almost gone to bed when a message came for you with a floor, hall, and room number. It was somewhat nerve-wracking, having no idea what was going to be in that particular room. Nevertheless, you straightened up and left for the specified location. 

You shouldn't have been surprised by the number of high ranking officers on this floor, but you weren't quite expecting it. You felt substantially out of place, trying to find your destination as quickly as possible. You rounded the corner to the hall you needed, and slammed into a superior officer. You stumbled into the wall hard, exclaiming softly, and looking up to find your own supervisory officer scowling down at you.

"Exactly what are you doing here, ensign? You don't have the authorization to be in these quarters." they looked furious. You opened your mouth to say that General Hux had sent for you, but it occurred to you that he may not have been the one that sent you to this location. There was no name, you realized. 

"I... sir, I was sent--"

"I sent for her, lieutenant, please excuse yourself." General Hux's voice cut in from several feet away, and you turned to find him leaning in a door frame. Oh, thank goodness. You gave a meek look to your supervisor, and hurried around them. You didn't need this kind of attention, you thought, as the general waved you into the room he stood at. 

Unfortunately, entering the room only added to your mortification, as you discovered it was the general's own quarters he'd invited you to. You stood awkwardly to the left of the door as it slid shut, watching as he strode towards the large desk in the center of the room. His quarters were orderly, somewhat impersonal, if not for the books on the shelves and the liquor on the desk. White and grey, but for the tiniest tint of blue. The General turned to look at you, and gestured at a chair set at side of his desk, closer to his own than it would be from the other side; it materialized his desire to feel closer, you figured, while maintaining his rank.

You moved toward the seat he indicated, and sat yourself down. General Hux rounded the desk to his own seat, and you eyed him nervously; he had a long, certain stride, upright posture. It was natural, as though he was born with such confidence and authority, made you feel anxious by comparison. "It's rather late, isn't it?" you mentioned, casually. The way he dropped into his chair was more than enough to tell you that he knew that. He was still upright, for the moment, but at rest, spread wide and comfortable, a small voice at the back of your head said that his lap looked awfully inviting.

"I'll admit, I got rather involved with work and forgot until a little while ago," Hux said, somewhat sheepishly. He reached forward to pour drinks, and you smiled gently at him. 

"You didn't have to see me tonight, if you're tired--"

"I wouldn't have wanted you to think I'd changed my mind about seeing you. To have asked and then brush you off... I'd have at least had the courtesy to tell you in person." The General insisted. You tensed as he handed you a drink. That sounded a lot more personal than just speaking with a subordinate. You flushed, and looked to his bookshelf as you sipped your drink. How to ask... when you looked back, Hux was scrutinizing you. "You're questioning my intentions." 

"I... I am, yes." You admitted, looking down into your glass, embarrassed. Goddamn, you should be more in control of yourself, you're a spy for shit's sake. There was a twitch in the corner of his lips, and he hid it quickly into his own drink; a good thing too, because if he smiled at you, you might melt. You glanced up at him, then back down. "I'm going to be honest--"

"I'd hope so."

"--I'm not sure what I'd expected from this. I think, I'm insisting to myself that this is about the information I'd given you, but..." you trailed off, still not sure how to phrase it. Would it offend him? 

"What if it isn't?" Hux asked, leaning back comfortably in his chair and relaxing. The amused expression he had made you think he liked seeing you nervous, made him feel big or something. You couldn't answer, and he set his glass down to lace his fingers together over his abdomen. "I find you endearing. You're sharper than most. You're excellent in your position." 

"I..." 

"I'm interested in pursuing you romantically." 

So blunt! It, like a lot of things he'd done around you, took you by surprise, and you didn't know how to react. He was attractive and successful, why should he be interested in you? Your heart leapt uncontrollably. He watched you carefully, and after much time to process, stumbling attempts to speak, you managed to get something out. "I... I'm flattered. I don't know what to say." You told him, sincerely. Hux looked pleased. 

"You don't have to say anything. I'll continue to pursue you until you tell me to stop."

\------

You returned to your quarters late at night, slightly tipsy and still processing. He made his intentions towards you clear, told you he would respect your word and insisted that he, nor no other superior officer, would treat you differently in the job for it. You had nodded, hadn't had much you could say....

And when you returned to your quarters, you regretted it. You lay in your bunk for hours, looking out into space through a tiny window in the hull. You should have turned him down right then, you realize. You were not here to seduce a First Order general, you were here to hide within their ranks and one day betray them. You had hardly let yourself befriend Ellerly, and here you were, drooling over the red-headed fascist figurehead himself.

You drifted to sleep thinking of him- neat red hair, pale skin, tired but ruthless blue eyes. Conscious thought turned to unconscious dreams, and you would wake wet and ashamed. Dreams of leather-clad fingers brushing your lips and lilting, teasing words that you couldn't quite remember when you opened your eyes.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader overhears some things, and has an interesting encounter with her general.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things get intense. Sorry it took so long but i had to rewrite a future chapter three times and add some things to this one and the next. 
> 
> Thanks for the kudos, loves. 
> 
> Hella love to the people that commented on ch. 3!:  
> Cosmic, neopolitan513, TimeToGetSithFaced, lewdlordmiraak, PrinceSnarking, Joe_Kerr001, and calina_tere.

"We picked up a resistance member on Jakku!" you overheard in the mess hall. You sat at one end of a table by yourself, doing little more than playing with your food and people-watching. Your ears perked up at the rumor. Ellerly sure was informed, wasn't he? "I heard he's their best pilot. The resistance should take a good hit from losing him." 

"I don't know, from how the general and Lord Ren are acting, I'd say interrogation isn't going well..." 

The best pilot? You'd heard things, but you'd never met him. Damee-something. You flicked half-eaten biscuit over your dish, and stood to leave. Resistances members got captured all the time; it wasn't something you needed to risk your cover over. Or was it? How skewed had your morals become since taking on this assignment? Probably best not to think about it.

You headed out towards your quarters, looking for a nap before your shift. Your head was elsewhere; the General had asked that you come see him again later today; this time, in the superior officer's own lounge. A part of you wanted to say no to it, didn't want anyone to see you, and yet... he was very kind about it. And you were told, awhile back, that they had almost as many windows as the bridge, and you wanted to see.

You stepped into the hall, fully intent to mind your own business, until you heard a furious conversation a few meters ahead. General Hux and Kylo Ren, in fact, were conversing heatedly as they strode down the corridor, and while you didn't want to be anywhere near either of them in a fury, you were halted without realizing. "...should have no problem retrieving the droid. Unharmed." Kylo Ren's words became clear. You had no idea what they were talking about. Hux's rebuttal came seconds later, but perhaps not as threateningly delivered as he had hoped. 

"Careful, Ren, that your personal interests not interfere..." and here, he trailed off a moment as he caught sight of you. You jumped in surprise, and looked at your feet as you scuttled away as he finished. "Not interfere with orders from Leader Snoke." 

You could feel Kylo Ren turning to look at you, even without seeing it with your own eyes. His very presence felt heavy, and you didn't care to feel the burden of his attentions during an argument between the two of them. "Perhaps you ought to consider the same, General. I want that map."

\------

"How do you feel about Lord Ren?" Hux asked; he was trying to be casual, you could see, but he watched you from the corner of his eye. You were watching the stars out the wall of windows in the officer's lounge. He had done his best to ease the situation for you, made sure that the room was clear that evening so you would feel more comfortable. It was very kind. 

You glanced at him, shrugging your shoulders. "I... I suppose I respect him as a superior, but I don't know much about him personally. I think it's best that way." You answered thoughtfully. What did Lord Ren matter to him? Maybe it only came up because you saw them together today. 

"But what of his abilities?" he inquired further. You frowned, shifting. 

"I.... I don't like to think about it. It's not something I need to have an opinion on. I don't-... W-why?" you stumbled over words. He held up a hand to quiet you, and you picked at your fingernails anxiously. 

"Excuse me, I didn't mean to upset you," Hux said gently. You glanced up at him, and he gave you a slight smile. "An appropriate response, to your credit, anyhow." 

You gave him a quiet smile again. You turned back to watch the stars again, trying to relax again. You peeked at his reflection in the glass, letting yourself admire his posture, the way he stood tall, hands clasped behind his back. To your embarrassment, he caught your eyes, knew you'd been looking.

"Can you show me where your sun is?" he asked. You looked up at him again, surprised by the question. You smiled coyly. 

"Is this curiosity, or are you testing me as a navigator?" you teased. 

"Why not both?" 

You looked out over the stars. Did it matter which was yours? It was a sweet question though. Maybe. "Which side of the ship are we on?" 

"Port." 

You looked back out over the stars. 3D navigation was interesting. If the ship was at a slightly different angle, all your coordinates would be off. "It's... there. Sort of. It doesn't look quite right, I think we're tilted a bit." you explained. There was a delighted pride in his expression, and you glowed in it. 

\------

"There are rumors about you, you know?" Ellerly told you, around the terminal. You shifted in your seat, looking up from your data curiously and somewhat uncomfortable. "Really... nasty things about... You doing... _things_ , for a promotion."

You scoffed. "That's petty. It's nothing like that, he's... He's charming, I just...." You stopped yourself. That's not what this was about. 

"Our superior officer saw you going into the general's room..."

"What, you think I'd--" you stopped again, glowering down at the terminal. "If that's what you think of me, Ellerly, then you just--"

"No, I'm sorry, I just... be careful." Ellerly warned. 

Before you could rebuke, a flurry swept through the bridge. General Hux looked furious. "Ensign, return us to Jakku immediately!" he shouted across the floor. You and Ellerly answered "sir" in perfect unison. 

"There's been an unauthorized departure..."

\------

You were surprised to find the general hitting the comms at your door after your shift. Your roommate, an engineer called Letty, was away on her shift, so you didn't have to give her some excuse. You considered your clothing options briefly; no time for much, you decided, and even as you tried to quiet it, a part of you was far too excited about a personal visit at this hour. You slipped into a long shirt and hit the button for the door. "General?" It was a question and a greeting in the same. He did little more than acknowledge it, and invaded your room without question; a significant change to the usual consideration he granted you. The door slid shut behind him, and you turned to follow him, subtly kicking Letty's pile of dirtied work clothes into the storage space beneath her bed. 

Stress was pouring from him, you realize, now that it was contained in your small quarters. He could not bring his gaze to yours yet, perhaps until he figured out what it was he wanted to say. You watched him look out the tiny, mediocre window-- little more than a porthole-- and scowl. Patiently, you moved and sat down on your bed, waiting for him to speak. He turned to you finally, eyes looking over your, for once, completely casual frame. You glanced down at yourself. "I, uhm... sorry, for my, uh... state of undress..." you murmured. 

"It's not important," he dismissed. You shifted slightly on your bed. It shouldn't be important, you agreed, but after he'd actually looked at you, you felt like you should have been more modest. He never seemed to miss a thing, eyes sharp and scrutinizing, and under that sort if gaze, even fully clothed, it was hard not to feel naked. While you were mulling it over, he cracked. "I need your help."

Your head snapped up to him, baffled. If he needed you, then certainly your clothing would matter; if you were to be called back to your post, you would need-- No. He didn't mean in that way, did he? This was too informal to be about the Order. "What could I possibly do for you?" you questioned. 

Hux looked you evenly in the eye. The question was innocent, genuine, and he almost smiled for the naivety. You knew why he spent time with you, he made sure you knew. "I feel that I am not I'm control, and I'd like your help." He watched your face contort with embarrassment and confusion in equal measure.

"Sir? Everyone on this ship, in the Order, would obey every word..." 

"Would you?" It was not so much what he said, the way he said it, as it was look in his eyes as the words left him that has your heart thudding so loudly in your chest you were certain he could hear it. Your cheeks burned, lips parted. You licked your lips. He was implying something sinful, you knew, and you didn't want to stop it.

"Yes," you answered. When had you become breathless? He shouldn't have this affect on you, a voice in your head screamed. His approach was slow, calculated, and had your legs quivering from anticipation. 

"Every word?" he continued softly. You swallowed thickly, unconsciously leaned forward. 

"Yes... Yes sir."

"Stand, ensign." 

You got to your feet immediately, and it puts you directly before him, perhaps inches from him. You drowned in smell; a musk, leather, and cologne, a clean smell, one that had your mouth watering, your knees weak. His eyes were sharp on you. You wanted to touch him, but didn't dare. Not unless he told you... God, you wanted to. 

"If I were to tell you to kneel for me?" 

After a mere moment's pause, you dropped to your knees before him... inches from his groin, close enough that your core wet at the thought of him pulling himself from his trousers, of him taking what he wanted from you. Your eyes remained glued to his, basking in the clear pleasure he took in you obeying him. A gloved hand reached for you, the leather caressing your cheek with the barest of brushes, and it took all you had not to lean in to him. His thumb found your lips, parted them, slid between. Your tongue moved to meet it, licking over the tip, eyes sliding down, closed. His hand snatched away abruptly, moving instead to grip your chin tightly. Your head was lifted to once again meet his eyes, the desire in them startling you, matching your own. Apprehensively, he let you go and took a step back.

"Excuse me," he said, quite simply, before leaving you alone, confused and wanting.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Starkiller comes into play.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit shorter, but I'll be posting another chapter _probably_ either later today or tomorrow, assuming I finished up the one I'm working on fairly quickly (although, my son just got the lid off a container of crunchies and dumped them all over the living room floor, so if that's any indication of my day...). 
> 
> Thank you, everyone, for being so patient with me. 
> 
> Love to my sweets that commented on ch. 4:   
> (deleted), calina_tere, Joe_Kerr001, Kidamon180, James, matxuoka, freshneverfrozen, and Meaghan M. 
> 
> Thank you to calina_tere for helping me! I know it was awhile back but I haven't forgotten. <3

"We're going to be parted for a time," General Hux said softly. It was a tone you remembered from a dream, but you couldn't remember the dream anymore. He had invited you to his quarters again, choosing the comfort of his own things, however few they were. "We're going to make a statement; soon, no one will dare to oppose the First Order." 

The words gave you chills. The look in his eyes, that intense commitment, told you that even if no one else could follow through with such words, he could. If he could do nothing else, he could do this. it was a stark reminder of the reason you were here. Your head dropped. "I... I'll look forward to your return," you answered, feeling shame at your own honesty. 

His gloved fingers grazed your chin, directing you back up to meet his gaze. You swallowed thickly, waiting for you had no idea what. "Kiss me," he ordered quietly, and with the most imperceptible of hesitations, you did, standing on your tiptoes to reach his mouth. He was chaste, getting the barest taste of you on his lips, before you were dismissed. 

______

You weren't awake when he landed on Starkiller Base. You had retreated to your bunk early, as you had for days now, to do nothing more than lay on your military cot and mull over that night again and again until you fell asleep. The other night had confused you. When you were away from him, your morals, your beliefs, your instincts told you he was awful, he was dangerous, he was deranged, you should flee... and the second he was near, he set you off. Nerves on fire, hormones spiking, desire to please. Your self-control was gone in seconds and you would have done whatever he asked, let him use you.

You would never admit that you touched yourself to thoughts of him to help you sleep. Even just the look in his eyes when you did something that pleased him, dark and obscene, was enough to make you throb with heat. You dreamed of him, and you couldn't say if it was a good dream, or a nightmare. 

General Hux's voice was blared from the comm system, likely to the entire First Order; the sound of him, right after your dreams, was confusing, frightening, and for a few terrifying moments, you thought you were still asleep, that you would never wake from dreams of him. The sight of Letty in the bunk across from you was comforting. "Today is the end of the Republic! The end of a regime that acquiesces to disorder! At this very moment, in a system far from here, the New Republic lies to the galaxy while secretly supporting the treachery of the loathsome Resistance! This fierce machine which you have built, upon which we stand will bring an end to the Senate, to their cherished fleet! **All remaining systems will bow to the First Order, and will remember this as the last day of the Republic!** "

You felt equal parts denial and terror, as you climbed slowly from your bunk and made your way to the tiny window in the far wall. With eyes still battling the heaviness of sleep, you watched bright orange flash across the galaxy, and fought back hysteria when you felt, down to your very core, hundreds of billions of lives snuffed out in a second at the whim of one awful man. 

\------

He had to stop thinking about you, Hux cursed, alone in his quarters. He had chosen to stay awake to work, but he couldn't, not like this. The memory of your soft sweet lips, pliant against his own... He wanted you desperately.

Hux left his desk-- no sense in staying there if he wasn't going to accomplish anything-- and made to ready himself to finally sleep. In the comfort of his bed, you were in his thoughts once more. The kiss you shared before he left the _Finalizer_ was simple, lovely, but he wanted more out of you. It took all he had not to simply have you the other night when he called upon you. The memory of your lips and tongue on the tip of his thumb sustained him since you parted, but all he could think of was giving you something else to wrap your sweet lips around. He had been so tempted that evening... so tempted to simply order you to submit... and by the look on your face at the time, he knew you would. 

Hux pulled himself from his boxers and licked the palm of his hand. It felt deliciously obscene, stroking himself with little to ease the way, thinking of you. His hand wasn't what he wanted, needed, but it was all he could do to keep himself off of you. At least until you gave yourself to him...

He imaged your lips kissing and enveloping the head of his cock, remembering the way his thumb pressed so easily between them the other evening. You were so compliant, completely docile; would you protest when he fucked into your throat? God, he wanted to. He wanted to take you apart, little by little until your carefully controlled tongue was finally loose and you could hold nothing back from him. He wanted you begging for him. How would he find your cunt? Wet, hot, soft, he imagined, dripping with a need for him to fill you. He would make you grovel, and how sweet it would be.

His hand continued to work his prick after he came, draining himself, so he could finally rest. He was tired of being patient, he thought, as he drifted to sleep.

\------

You felt Kylo Ren's eyes on you as he entered the bridge. You didn't know what to make of it at the moment, didn't have the capacity. "Set course for Takodana, in the Tashtor Sector." 

With little more than a "yessir," you obeyed.


End file.
